Homework time in many households often changes from a simple daily routine into a battleground, with stress levels rising for both parents and children. If you find yourself questioning whether your attempts to help are more disruptive than beneficial, you’re not alone.
The good news is that it doesn’t have to be that way. Ted Swartz, holding a Ph.D. in Educational Psychology from New York University and co-founder of Be Brilliant! Tutoring, offers a beacon of hope for frustrated parents. His proven tips arm caregivers with several easily comprehensible tips to make homework time a more positive, productive, and less stressful experience.
“Respecting your child’s natural and amazing capacity as a learner is the key. By truly thinking of yourself as a partner, ready to support and understand how and what they’re thinking, you can transform your relationship regarding homework,” assures Swartz.
The following strategies change homework time from stress to success. All of them work and practicing even just one or two will make all the difference in the world.
- Watch and Listen Closely: Ask yourself, especially when you might be befuddled and maybe worried about what your child is saying or doing, “What is my child thinking at this moment?”
- Give Ample Wait Time: One of the best things you can do is not rush your child. You may feel impatient, given all of the pressures to get things done. Don’t rush things or risk creating anxiety and resentment.
- Invite Your Child to Explain: Feel free to ask your child how they arrived at an answer, whether correct or incorrect, and do that in a neutral voice, reflecting your genuine interest to know. Doing so frees them from worrying so much about always being right.
- Ask Your Child to Share What They Notice: That type of question, entirely open-ended, expresses your interest in how they are relating to the assignment and provides you with essential clues on what more specific, targeted questions you might follow up with.
- Avoid Praise to Motivate: It is far more useful to provide neutral feedback, for clarity. For example, instead of, “You are so smart… I am so proud of you,” see what happens when you instead say something like, “I noticed that you found three ways to solve that problem.” That equalizes the relationship, so you are not the judge and jury, giving or withholding unnecessary “reinforcement.” Trust their discovering their inner drive to know and understand.
- Welcome Mistakes: Nothing worthwhile is learned without mistakes. When you begin to see them as guideposts, pointing you in the right direction as someone supporting your child’s learning, your efforts become far more successful, and your child will be forever grateful.
- Avoid Telling Answers or Asking Leading Questions: There are certain situations where your child cannot otherwise know an answer, for example, that the capital city of New York State is Albany, so you would of course tell them. In all other circumstances, it is far better to avoid just telling answers, for example, that “the main character in the story is Glenn,” or to make leading statements like, “The main character in the story is a little boy and his name starts with a G.” Instead, ask questions that are more open ended, such as “Tell me everyone you think is important in the story” and “Why do you think they are important?”
- Let Matters Sometimes Remain Unsettled: If confusion, resistance and frustration persist, do not insist that everything gets sorted out right away. You might want to see what happens later in the evening or even the next morning. Nothing promotes learning better than a good night’s sleep!
By following Dr. Swartz’s expert tips, parents can create a supportive, efficient, and positive learning environment at home. The strategies not only alleviate the homework blues but also foster a lifelong love of learning in children. As parents, the greatest gift we can offer is the tools for success, autonomy, and the resilience to face academic challenges with confidence and positivity.
Be Brilliant! Tutoring recently opened a location in Bronxville, at 51 Pondfield Road. Be Brilliant! Tutoring (BB!T) offers unparalleled educational support to students ages 4 through 14 seeking to enhance their academic performance and discover their innate brilliance. With a rich history of fostering exceptional educational outcomes, including the instrumental role in establishing two charter schools in the Bronx that have consistently surpassed New York State averages on tests, Be Brilliant! Tutoring is set to make a significant impact on the community.
At BB!T, the focus is on every child retaining the curiosity, eagerness, and confidence they show before starting school. The mission is to reignite those qualities, transforming how children view academic challenges. Unlike typical tutoring services, BB!T is staffed exclusively by Master Teachers — seasoned professionals with master’s degrees or doctorates in education — who have expertise in an instructional approach, called the Subordination of Teaching to Learning. That approach keeps students in touch with their love of learning, a love they demonstrate as babies and toddlers.
Students enrolled at BB!T benefit from a tailored program that not only aims for better grades and higher test scores, but also focuses on three critical areas for future success: Fulfillment, Confidence, and Brilliance.
The unique methodology used by the Master Teachers fosters satisfaction and joy in learning, cultivates self-assurance and independence, and helps students realize their intellectual potential.
The center serves children pre-kindergarten through 8th grade and has flexible days and hours to accommodate student and parent schedules. All tutoring is done in person and video streaming of the sessions is available. Slots are limited and parents are encouraged to call (914) 392-1655 for more information.
